Saturday 21 May 2011

5 Weeks 3 Days


Our IUI information session is next week Thursday. Unfortunately the next available appointment for the scan is on Friday, the day after, aaaaaarrrrrrrgggggggggghhhhhh!!

*pounds fists in frustration*

I was hoping to at least get the scan done a day before or on the day of the IUI so that if it turned out to be ectopic we would still go ahead with the IUI as a second option, instead of waiting forever to conceive again. But now I cannot in all good conscience go to an IUI session pretending I’m not pregnant. We’ve waited over 6 months to get the appointment, waited 4 years to get pregnant…. Gosh. It’s so hard to decide. I’ll call the nurse next week and ask if I should still come in even if I suspect that I may be pregnant… I just don’t want to make a wrong move, get crossed off the list then we find out that it’s ectopic, or there’s no baby growing in there.

Hey, I’m just being realistic and keeping my options open. Nobody wants to have an ectopic but it hasn’t been ruled out yet. I still get the pain on my left side from time to time. Some days are worse than others, but its not crippling or getting progressively worse or anything scary. I’ve been getting other sorts of dodgy pains going on down there.

On the symptoms front, it’s still mainly sore bbs and painful nips; though not as sore today as the past few days, but I’m not going to worry about it. They also itch from time to time. I’ve been peeing less often than I normally do; which is VERY unusual for me (and a welcome break, actually. Thank God!). I’ve always had the problem of peeing like a fish in heat. When I was younger my mum took me through a bunch of urologists in different hospitals and none of them could explain why I always peed a lot. When I say pee a lot, I don’t mean I used to wet myself, more like I could drink a glass of water right now and pee three to four times within the next 30minutes. The last doctor I saw in my early twenties mumbled something about my body not being able to hold unto potassium, and that was the end of it. I pretty much accepted that I can’t hold water and will always pee like a fish for the rest of my life.

To be honest I haven’t been looking forward to the symptom of ‘peeing a lot’. Thank God it has eluded me so far even though I’m thirstier these days. In the last 2 hours I’ve drank at least half a litre of water and have only peed twice; which is nothing short of a miracle!

I get tired easily and I’m constantly yawning. No nausea or sickness yet. I get dizzy while praying; when I go from prostrating to standing up. Loss of appetite but no food aversions. I’ve heard that the nausea really hits after 6 weeks. To be honest I just want to know that I have a healthy baby. I’m not hankering for nausea and vomiting even though they are the hallmarks of being pregnant. Every pregnant woman prays for nausea, no thanks to the old wives tale that the sicker you are the healthier your baby is. Bullshit! Such things make you worry to death for nothing. I’ll be thanking my Lord and rubbing my hands with glee if nausea and sickness pass me by, lol…

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